Stupid Hangers, they shrunk my clothes!

One of the things I like best about making lampwork beads is that once they are made, they don't shrink. You make them to a certain size and shape, and glass beads stay that way, unless you happen to drop them on concrete or ceramic tile floors where they might shatter. This vessel, for example, is a blown lampwork vessel. I blew the glass and shaped the vessel. I put the shaped vessel back in the flame to gently warm the glass, and then I put the vessel in the kiln to soak. When the kiln cooled, and I removed the vessel, it was still the same shape, and, most importantly, the same size that it had been when I put it in the kiln. No shrinkage there at all.

The same is not true of clothing. After the intense heat of the summer, while my jeans hung on the hangers, I trusted they would be the same size when autumn came around. Can you imagine my surprise when, on the first cool day of autumn, I put on a pair of jeans, and they had shrunk! "That doesn't happen with glass," I thought!

I tried on another pair of jeans. Same result. I thought about the problem. I knew what had happened. The hangers shrunk my jeans! I looked at those brightly colored pieces of plastic, and I knew. They were the cause of my discomfort when I put on the jeans. I solved that problem easily enough, I threw the hangers away! No more of those hangers making my jeans shrink again! I bought new jeans.

Then came the holiday season. I pulled out a pair of slacks to wear to a party. What? The hangers struck again! My pants from last season were too small! I don't understand this. I don't want to feel paranoid around my hangers, but I know they were the cause of the misfit slacks. Stupid hangers, they shrunk my clothes again! I'll never buy that brand of hangers again. After the holidays, I plan to write the manufacturers and tell them why I will never buy their hangers. It's not my fault these clothes don't fit.

At least, my pendants haven't changed. The vessels I wear are the same size. Stupid hangers! Buy glass instead!