Friday, October 21, 2016

A Blog Can Be the Other Side of the Story

I am one of those mothers whose life was at risk during my last pregnancy. I was told the longer I carried, the higher the risk of losing my  life. If a woman learned of a risk late term, the solution is delivery of a viable baby, not abortion. I carried my baby to 30 weeks, and he and I survived. Who is to say my life was any more valuable than his? If anything the argument could be made as his mother, it would fall on my shoulders to protect him, even with my life. It seem backwards for a child to sacrifice for the parent.

I struggled to have my children, and losing my twin preemies makes one understand how precious life is.  This topic gets me riled up because we didn't know if I could have a child.  I have a friend who actually asked me to take her to an abortion clinic.  I was outraged. I tried so hard to have a baby, and we looked at adoption. With my child,  the doctors told me I had to have him to save myself.  I fought with them, insisted on steroid shots to help mature his lungs.  I was in ICU with Hellp syndrome and was told the only cure was to have the baby.  I denied consent.  I ended up having an emergency c-section. On my way into surgery,  I prayed for God to take me and save my son. I felt this warm feeling engulf me and knew God was taking control.  I cry when I tell the story.  I have felt God bless me and my son.

Thursday, October 20, 2016

Wednesday, October 19, 2016

A Blog Can Be Worth Repeating: I Had to Look Back to Find Him: Moments with God

He was there with me.  I just didn't know it.
Thanksgiving morning, my beautiful, loving, therapy dog came down the stairs dragging her foot.
I thought she had had a stroke during the night.
She would whine a little, but something was terribly wrong.
Of course, the vet was closed that day.
Since we were dining with friends, I decided I wouldn't go.  
I knew I had to stay home with Pixie.
My tall son came downstairs and lifted Pixie on to the couch to give her some relief.
I told him I wasn't going to dinner.
He suggested I call our friends and ask if we could bring Pixie along.
Maybe she would stay in the garage.
I did just that, and they said, "Bring her, but we'll put her in the house."
(They do not allow animals in their home normally.)
So, off we went to dinner.
Pixie was put in their bedroom on the floor, covered up with a blanket and our jackets.
I didn't realize it, but everyone kept sneaking into the bedroom with hugs, love and food.
I was still very worried.
Dinner was over.  My son picked her up and scooped her into the car.  I remember thinking that I could never carry that 60+ pound dog, but he did it with ease.
We got home.  Pixie was no better, so I called the vet.
She told me what to do to help relieve her pain, and she had me make an appointment for Friday.
Friday morning, we had a diagnosis:
Lumbosacral stenosis.
It's a very painful, degenerative condition, however,
Again, we went home, this time armed with medications that would relieve Pixie's pain.
She responded in less than an hour.
Now, she wasn't healed, and she had a long way to go, but she was clearly on the mend.
She was carried around in the strong arms of my son.
He took her out and walked her, as best she could be walked since she was dragging her leg and walking on her knuckles, to go potty.
That night I slept on the couch while Pixie slept on the love seat.
We all made our sacrifices, but Saturday morning, the pain had returned.  I called the vet.  They asked me to bring her right in.  There was a change of medications and a laser treatment was added.
You could see Pixie visibly relax.  Things got better for her.
Fast forward to Monday.
Pixie was going up and down the stairs, again, even though her leg was a little gimpy.  
She had an appointment for another laser treatment.
We beat the snow, and she feels better.
Her leg is still very weak.  She almost slipped going down the stairs, but I don't have to carry her.
So, where was God.  I had to look back to see and know that He had been with me through all of it.
1) Pixie's stenosis had never acted up before.  If my son had not been home, I could not have carried her.  She's just too heavy for me.  The timing was impeccable.
2)  Pixie responded to the medications within an hour, and they are not that expensive.  She will need to be on them the rest of her life.
3) Our friends allowed Pixie to come to Thanksgiving, and, they allowed her to be in their bedroom!
3) The laser treatments helped!  Not every dog responds the way Pixie did.
4) Even though her leg is a little bit weak, and it will, most likely stay that way, Pixie is learning how to use her other legs to adjust.
5) Even when I was at my lowest being worried about Pixie, I felt that everything was going to be all right.  I know she's 11, and I have been blessed with her.  I have to be ready to let her go.  The thought was overwhelming for me, but I made it through.
God found His way through the chaos of my live to let me know that He loved me and that He loved Pixie.
I was blessed and inspired to think about all of this.
Chaos is chaos, but Love trumps chaos with no effort at all.
Thank You, Lord, for reminding me that no matter what, no matter where, 
You are always there for me.

Tuesday, October 18, 2016